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House Speaker Paul Ryan Tries Out Comedy, Stephen Colbert-Style

Writer Michael N. Marcus calls Hunter J. Marcus his “four-legged son” and “an ordinary golden retriever who became an extraordinary dog.

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Smack in the middle of his’ I will not accept the GOP nomination’ publicity tour, Ryan made a fairly successful late-night talk demonstrate debut–and get in some talking points, as well.”>

For a man who claims he doesnt want to be president, Speaker of the House Paul Ryan is sure putting himself out there.

His appearance Tuesday night on CBSs Late Show with Stephen Colbertthe 46 -year-old Ryans maiden voyage on a network late-night talk showwas only his most recent stop on a full-dress publicity tour to sell the idea that under no circumstances will he agree to have his name put in for nomination in Cleveland this July.

A recent campaign-style video produced by his ever-ready personnel, however, indicated the opposite to some conspiracy theorists, should the Republican convention devolve into a multi-ballot develop wreck, and perhaps riots in the street, as Donald Trump falls short of the magic 1,237 and the delegates refuse to rally around him or any of the other also-rans.

Yes or nowould you accept the nomination? Colbert asked Ryan, who was sitting behind a massive desk and in front of an American flag, in a satellite feed from Washington.

No, Stephen, Ryan replied. I have said I do not want , nor would I accept, the Republican nomination.

Got it, Colbert said. Soyoure considering the nomination?

No, Im not.

OK. Ill give you some time to mull this one over. Long pause as Colbert licked the tip-off of his pen and pretended to scribble something. How about now?

Still no.

By this point, as the studio audience tittered, it was clear that Ryan and Colbert were not actually participating in an interview but following a slapstick script devised by the Late Show writers.

Unlike his immediate predecessorsthe orange-hued, red wine-swilling, cigarette-inhaling John Boehner; the elegantly attired, sharp-elbowed San Francisco Democrat Nancy Pelosi; and the criminally libidinous former high school wrestling coach-and-four Denny Hastert( the less said about him, the better) the super-fit Ryan is at pains to disclose himself as a millennial-friendly, media-savvy modern politician.

Indeed, before he launched into the shtick, Ryanwho became a recognizable national figure four years ago as Mitt Romneys vice presidential operating matemade a pitch for his positive vision of the Grand Old Party, in which the Republican House members offer solutions instead of obstruction.

Ryan, speaking rapid-fire, talked about how were offering an agenda to the country that sounded nothing like the hard and bitter one being proposed by the reality demonstrate billionaire who won Tuesdays New York Republican primary in a landslide.

An earnest young congressman from Janesville, Wisconsinand a one-time waiter at Tortilla Coast, a Capitol hill watering holeRyan by most accounts accepted the speakership under protest after the House GOPs Tea Party faction drummed the moderate Boehner out of the job.

Sitting at the big desk that looked at least three times as old as he is, Ryan touted economic growth, problem-solving, national security, patient-centered health care, and an ideas campaign , not a personality contestwhich, patently, has little relationship to the garish sight currently riveting the media-political complex.

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